It’s days like today doubt likes to creep in…my faith, once a solid wall is breached with emotion, uncertainty, and misplaced understanding…It’s days like today that I struggle to speak with God…my words are void in a voice that has no substance or resonance in these hours…It’s days like today that I don’t even bother to crack open God’s Word…even though I know I would probably find rescue there, I find it simpler to instead just sit…rummaging through the thoughts in my head…feeling the air somehow get thicker in my chest…I’m not contributing…I’m not acting…I’m just existing on days like today.
I’m stuck…here in the middle…
But…
Somewhere in me…
There is strength…there is courage…there is fight…drive…and determination. Somewhere in me there is a river of belief that God will do amazing things in my life and in the lives of those around me. I will continue to breathe…I will continue to speak…I will continue to read in God’s Word…my hope will be whole once more…my joy and excitement for life will return…everything that has me stuck in these moments will be burned away by the knowledge that with tomorrow comes a new day…a new time…and a new chance for opportunities…blessings…happiness.
I am RESTLESS with the thought of pushing past, “the middle” but understanding of the realization that for just a few moments I will voluntarily allow it to paint dark strokes across my vision.
Because without these dark lines…I would never find deep appreciation for the light I will experience soon. In the darkness of the middle hope pulses in my chest like a heart beat…
Yes, these moments will pass…and the light will return…I believe that…
What do you believe?
